Thursday, August 14, 2014

A Critical Evaluation of the Warlord Cinematic

So here are a few initial thoughts on the Warlords of Draenor Cinematic.


  • Really excited to see gnomes featured so prominently.  Granted, it was just an advertisement off to the side, but still.  I'll take it.
  • While initially concerned, I thought Kim Kardashian really shined in the role of Pit Lord.
  • What happened in the past 35 years that caused Orcs to lose the ability to construct something more than two stories tall?
  • Is Thrall still green or will we be getting a new red Thrall.  Does this have any impact on the suggested side effects of green M&M's?
  • Can we just all agree to call this the AngryOrc expansion?  I mean, there was even a two handed axe firmly planted in a skull.  Doesn't get more AngryOrc than that.
  • I'm confused.  What are we fighting about?
  • Looking forward to the new improved St. Patricks day event featuring that weird green beer stuff that Grom was contemplating drinking.  Weirdest leprechaun ever though.
  • After all that work on character models and everything else, why do all the Orcs in the cinematic look exactly the same.  Could we get name tags please?
  • On November 13, 1914, Berber tribesman defeated the French in Morocco in the battle of El Herri.  Coincidence?  You be the judge.  Without that, the berber carpet in Mike Morhaime's rec room probably wouldn't be there.
  • None of the Orcs making their way to the giant building appeared to be flying, effectively confirming that there will be no flying in the new expansion.  Or that most netherdrake members of the Screen Actors' Guild continued to be on strike during the filming of the cinematic.
  • If all those torches are planning to stop by my garrison at some point, I'm going to need a level 4 dining room.
  • Orc orc orc orc orc orc orc orc....if you say that fast enough, it starts to sound like you're saying Kor over and over again.  The people that used to play Beatles albums backwards looking for secret messages are very concerned by this.

2 comments:

  1. Garrosh is clearly in cinematic version of Metzen, tattooed jaw = beard. Mannaroth is obviously representing WoWs bloated old self. Grom is killing Mannaroth. Metzosh saves Grom. Grom is WoW2 and Metzen is the hero! Its all so obvious!!!11

    Oh and the green was mashed up gnomes with a sprinkle of alliance envy. Clearly.

    Bet they thought they were oh so smart with their subtle hinting. Hah!

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  2. (this is Nina)

    My thoughts:

    Mannoroth clearly was AFK when the raid leader mentioned that the left side engineer had to die.

    I want Garrosh's Heroic Tackle ability on my warrior to get back at certain priests who have in the past used Lifegrip to humorous effect.

    I am more and more feeling like I should be siding with the Iron Horde. Watch the animated movie bit about Kargath. Why in the world do I want fight against brownskinned people who sacrificed their own hands in the struggle to free themselves from bloated rich white ogres?

    Where da wimmin at? Oh, right, women don't exist in core storyline events.

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